There seems to be something of a collective belief among many guys that you have to be some kind of James Bond type character to be really successful with women. This couldn’t be further from the truth.
Having great relationships with women is not about saying the perfect thing all the time or having the perfect response to anything a woman might say.
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It’s this kind of stereotype that often makes me shy away from telling people that I’m a dating coach, because if it isn’t immediately assumed I’m a sleazy player it’s often assumed that I’m some suave James Bond character. Along with this comes the assumption that I should always have the perfect thing to say and the assumption that I should never, ever make a mistake with a woman.
In truth I am in no way suave or sophisticated and I make mistakes all the time! In fact, it’s through making mistakes that I’ve grown enough to have some great relationships.
One of the keys to having great relationships is not in having the perfect thing to say all the time but in not caring when you say something silly. There will never be a time when you have the “right” words to say all the time, and at times you might say more than a few things that are inappropriate.
It is during these moments that, if you take yourself too seriously and worry about what you’ve said and what the other person thinks about you, the interaction will become a little uncomfortable.
However, if you can manage to have a laugh at yourself when you say something inappropriate and not worry too much what the woman thinks about you, the interaction will remain light, playful and relaxed.
“Your outer circumstances are a reflection of your inner thoughts” -Unknown
If you’re worried people are thinking bad things about you, you might just believe those thoughts into existence. Conversely, if you can stay relaxed, happy and playful, then it’s likely that those surrounding you will also adopt this vibe.
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Sebastian Callow is a personal dating coach for men in London. Unlike other dating services he provides a practical, real-life coaching experience that actually involves meeting and interacting with women in everyday situations. Sebastian helps men develop the comfort and ease to express themselves with raw honesty. If you're unhappy with your dating life and you're hungry for change, the Personal Coaching Course could be exactly what you need.