Sensuality can be defined as “The enjoyment and expression of pleasure”. We crave to enjoy pleasure in all its forms, in particular we crave to enjoy sexual pleasure. However, if you are unable to express pleasure than it’s unlikely that you’re going to be granted many opportunities to experience sexual pleasure.
Why?
Because someone who is unable to express the enjoyment of all the pleasures of life comes across as a very stale individual indeed. Someone who is unable to express all the pleasures of life lacks any juiciness whatsoever. They are as dry as a piece of stale bread.
Conversely, someone who is able to express pleasure communicates with vibrancy and radiates aliveness. They are as juicy as a succulent strawberry. Furthermore, since the act of having sex represents the height of sensuality and aliveness, the ability to express pleasure, or be sensual, is very sexually attractive.
What does the expression of pleasure look like?
Well, Marvin Gaye seems to have it down pretty well in this grainy video of a live performance of “Let’s get it on”:
So, how can we be more sensual if we’re not already inclined to be this way?
Well, don’t worry, I don’t expect you to start writhing around like Marvin in this youtube clip whilst you’re conversing with women. Actually, what it boils down to is two things. First, being more in touch with life itself and the aliveness that lights up our senses every second of every day. Second, simply communicating the joy that comes from this absolute intimacy with the sensuality of life.
Being more in touch with life itself and it’s sensuality can be achieved by stilling the mind, when the mind is still the senses are open and the aliveness of life is felt. This is what happens when we are overwhelmed by astounding beauty. For this reason it’s good to spend time communing with nature, because nature is nothing but astounding beauty; the sight of a raindrop sliding down a leaf, the feeling of the wind on your skin, or bathing in a perfect sunset.
Being able to communicate the joy of this sensuality is a natural consequence of experiencing it, and not being afraid to express how it makes you feel. You’ll find that the sensual experience of being with nature is not dissimilar to the sensual experience of being in the presence of a woman. Just as you can breathe in a beautiful scene in nature you can also breathe in a beautiful woman. And, as the senses are filled with the aliveness of what is right there in front of you there can be a spontaneous communication of the joy of this.
This is the enjoyment and the expression of pleasure… Sensuality!
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Sebastian Callow is a personal dating coach for men in London. Unlike other dating services he provides a practical, real-life coaching experience that actually involves meeting and interacting with women in everyday situations. Sebastian helps men develop the comfort and ease to express themselves with raw honesty. If you're unhappy with your dating life and you're hungry for change, the Personal Coaching Course could be exactly what you need.