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Home» Articles posted by Sebastian

About Sebastian

Sebastian is the founder of Authentic Man Within (AMW) at www.authenticmanwithin.com. AMW is a dating advice and coaching service that helps men become more courageous, more socially intuitive, more authentic, happier and healthier.

It was set up by Sebastian in September 2009 as a result of his continuing exploration of dating and social dynamics, and in response to the growing need for men to embrace their masculine core and connect with women face-to-face rather than hide behind their computer screens and play the online dating game.

AMW has been growing ever since, attracting clients from all parts of the UK, Europe and even the USA. Unlike other dating services, AMW provides a practical, real-life coaching experience. Clients receive first-hand, live demonstrations of how to start conversations with women and are invited to do the same under constructive supervision.

As the founder and primary Dating Coach at AMW, Sebastian has a great history of exploring social psychology and social dynamics, both in theory and through his life experience. An Applied Psychology graduate from the University of Durham and an aspiring Psychotherapist, Sebastian has also spent 4 years working in the face-to-face fundraising industry.

This means, on top of his theoretical understanding of human behaviour, he has spent 4 years starting conversation with strangers, for 8 hours a day and five days a week. Throughout this period he also worked as a Team Leader, coaching other people to do the same each and every day.

Subsequently, he has attained four years experience working directly with men to help them awaken the courage and conviction to reach out and connect with women in a more powerful way, and receives glowing reviews. His style of interaction, and the one he tries to instill in his clients, is one of being direct, playful, curious and authentic.

Sebastian feels that when a man’s external expressions most closely match his internal state, he will communicate with the most power, clarity and depth. In-turn, he will generate the highest levels of attraction and connection with the women he relates to, and his comfort and ease within himself will be at a premium.

Moreover, Sebastian feels that by starting conversations with women in an honest and authentic manner, a man can lay the best foundation for establishing a healthy relationship that is nourishing at the deepest levels for everyone concerned.

Sebastian understands the trials and tribulations modern men face in the dating game, all the more so as he himself has experienced these problems first hand, describing himself very much as a late bloomer:

“I’m 31 years old now and I wasn’t always successful with women. At 19 I was still a virgin and at 25 I found myself in the midst of a very long spell of unintentional celibacy. At this stage I had begun to invest a whole lot of time in learning how to relate to women in a more powerful way.

I would spend my free time going out three to four times a week, for several hours on each occasion, and starting conversations with every attractive woman I came across.

After a lot of stress and strain I became pretty successful at getting what I thought I wanted. However, I soon realised that I wanted more than just sex, and that the need for sex often had a corrosive effect on my interactions. I would often lose out with the women who I was really attracted to.

I found that the answer to deep connection was to abandon all need; the need to have sex, the need for female attention, and the need to be seen as someone who is successful with women.

In abandoning what I thought I needed I sunk back into my fullness, feeling absolutely whole and absolutely satisfied. The feeling of contentment, absent of need, is what allows for the deepest connection with another human being.

And paradoxically, the lack of attachment to any particular outcome, allows for whatever outcome is desired, to be fulfilled.”

Sebastian is AMW’s resident expert when it comes to creating a deep emotional connection with women. He has written over 90 articles on the AMW blog on dating, social dynamics, relationships and psychology.

His writing strikes at the heart of the problems that modern men face when it comes to relating to women and has been featured in a diverse array of publications, from Ebony Magazine to the work of Laura Schaefer who regularly writes for Match.com.

Sebastian firmly believes that men already have everything they need to succeed in the dating game, it’s just a case of awakening the Authentic Man Within.

In each and every man lies depths of courageousness, spontaneity and authenticity. Sebastian aims to point men back toward these innate strengths so that they can enliven themselves and the women they interact with.

Find more about me on:

  • googleplus Google Plus

Here are my most recent posts

Sex is NOT the goal…

Posted by Sebastian - May 15, 2017 - Psychology, Sex
6

SEX IS NOT THE GOAL! The men’s dating and self-improvement community is very confused. It’s focus is skewed towards sex, the ability to acquire sex, being a ‘sex-worthy’ man, letting your authentic self out so you can have more sex… Put it any way you want it, it’s all about sex! Even the guys who […]

Read More connection, fulfilment, sex

Being aloof VS going ‘balls deep’…

Posted by Sebastian - November 19, 2016 - Psychology, Relationships
0

If you’re familiar with the world of men’s self-development or even spirituality, you’ve probably found yourself learning about concepts like being unattached, outcome independent and unreactive. Like all concepts they are but a poor translation of what they hope to illustrate. More-often-than-not these concepts are misinterpreted to fit in with the fearful perspective of the one […]

Read More dating, outcome independence, unreactive

How to be a relationship warrior…

Posted by Sebastian - June 29, 2016 - Relationships
0

A warrior is defined as: “A person who fights in battles and is known for having courage and skill.” And what does being a warrior have to do with relationships which are supposed to be about love and intimacy? Well, when two people agree to play the game of mutual openness and intimacy it is […]

Read More relationship, relationship warrior, warrior

How to be impressive and unforgettable!

Posted by Sebastian - June 24, 2016 - Psychology
2

Working as a dating coach in London I regularly come across guys who are looking for the magic technique, the perfect line, that one thing that’ll help them to be impressive, impactful and unforgettable. The first thing to note here is that such a search is doomed from the outset, for if you have the […]

Read More be impressive, be unforgettable, dating coach london

Why ‘be yourself’ doesn’t seem to be working out for you…

Posted by Sebastian - May 11, 2016 - Dating Tips, Psychology
0

As a Dating Coach in London, I’m hesitant to offer the advice to ‘just be yourself’ in such simple terms. You’ve been being yourself throughout your life, right? And, to a great extent, you’re not getting the results you desire in dating and in life. You probably feel it’s time to try something different. But, […]

Read More be yourself, dating coach london, self-acceptance

Why it’s time to forget about being an ‘Alpha Male’…

Posted by Sebastian - May 4, 2016 - Psychology
2

As a dating coach in London, I’m presented with questions about the term ‘alpha male’ on a regular basis, most guys feeling that this is something they aspire to and must become. An ‘alpha male’ is defined as: “A male animal having the highest rank in a dominance hierarchy.” The term is typically used in reference to non-human apes and monkeys, where the ape/monkey who […]

Read More alpha male, attraction, dating coach london

Why you care so much what other people think…

Posted by Sebastian - April 27, 2016 - Psychology
0

You don’t want to talk to that girl at the cafe because she might think you’re weird. You don’t want to talk to that girl at the bus stop because other people might hear and think it’s ‘not right’. You don’t want to talk to that girl at the club because other girls might think […]

Read More dating coach london, self-acceptance, self-esteem

5 ways low self-esteem is killing your dating life…

Posted by Sebastian - March 9, 2016 - Psychology
2

What’s the difference that makes the difference when it comes to winning at dating and relationships? Contrary to popular opinion it’s not your looks or how much money you have in your bank account, it’s not even your knowledge and understanding of male/female dynamics and the dating game. It is, quite simply, your self-esteem! No […]

Read More dating coach london, failure, self-esteem

Sex is everything: Everything is sex…

Posted by Sebastian - January 13, 2016 - Sex
2

Everything is sexual… Everything! You’re very existence was brought about through the act of sex, and the survival of our species and every other species, plant or animal, is dependent on sex. Sex is the source and essence of life and it is self-evident wherever you choose to look. Everything is either an act of […]

Read More liberation, sex, shame

5 tell-tale signs that you’re not comfortable relating to women…

Posted by Sebastian - January 6, 2016 - Dating Tips, Psychology
0

A lot of guys in the world of men’s self-improvement, dating coaching and pick-up appear to be pretty good at relating to women, at least, if you didn’t know any better. A closer inspection reveals the cracks that show a fragile sense of self and a huge level of discomfort in relating to women. What […]

Read More discomfort, relating, women
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(c) 2015 Authentic Man Within - Dating Coach London & Dating Coach for Men, by Sebastian Callow